The Magic of Detachment: 3 Things You MUST Let Go of to Manifest Your Dream Life


Imagine that there's a river stream and you're just floating down this river stream. However, imagine that you're trying to grab onto branches and grab on to other things and trying to attach to it and imagine that if you were to just let go of all of that and go with the flow, that the river would take you exactly where you need to go. Today, I'm going to be showing you the power of detachment, how this can be like magic in your life and why the root of all suffering is attachment. This was something that Buddha said. The more attached we become two different things in our life, the more pain we create. The key is understanding that the more we detach, the freer we become.

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I'm going to share with you some things from my own life that I've noticed through this process and how it can change your life. It became very magical. First off, the thing that I want to share with you is a quote that I heard as well. It came from Deepak Chopra. I'm not going to read the exact quote, but the general idea is that inside of certainty is the prison of our own thoughts and certainties. We become attached to people. We become attached to our thoughts. We become attached to our own labels and in that attachment, is a certainty. Outside of that certainty is uncertainty and uncertainty is where infinite possibilities are. In a way, we hold ourselves through attachment to different ideologies. Maybe it's a certain person. Imagine that there are 7.5 billion people out there in the world and imagine that you are attached to one person.

It has to work right with one person and you inside of this little belief system are like, it needs to work out, and I'm attached and they need to act this way and then I can be happy. But imagine that you are actually possibly limiting yourself. Imagine that there are billions of people out there and there's a high likelihood that if you have such a deep connection with this one person, there's a high likelihood that there could be someone else out there that you have even a deeper connection with. That is just an example of this, but that's many times what we do. We may be holding onto certain perspectives that keep us in certainty and the Deepak Chopra quote was about uncertainty and uncertainty in the unknown is where infinite possibility is. It is where freedom is, and in this blog, I'm going to show you the magic of detachment, how you tap into it and how things really become magical.

When we get out of the prison of our own beliefs, the prison of our own attachment and anytime think about anytime we to our own thoughts, that's where the pain starts to come from. That's where then we start to get in this little negative thought loop. There was something I was thinking about the other day and I just kept thinking about it. The more I thought about it, the more it grew and the more attached to it I was and the more then I would go out into the world and see other things that reflected that back to me. But the moment I caught myself in the moment I became detached from it. Think about it. When you become detached, you then are able to separate yourself from being inside of it. You can then observe it in a new way and when you observe it in a new way, that's where power is.

I've attachments and their way of control. First off, there are different ways we become attached in general. We can become attached by our thoughts, we can become attached to people and how people act. We can become attached to the outcome. This is something I've definitely been attached to in my life is I've been attached to pretty much all of these. I'm sure we all have, but beliefs. Another one touches certain beliefs. This is the way reality is. Labels. I am somebody with ADHD, this is who I am. It's also kind of tied into an identity as well. I'm to give him some of my notes here. I wanted to make this blog a little bit more in detailed understanding this whole process and really how it works and what we've become attached to. A lot of what we become attached to in general is we have this attachment because we like a certainty when we have certainty, we feel safe, but many times what happened is we became safe and we decided this is very important to become safe.

Then we drained out the magic of life. We drained out allowing the universe to show us an infinite possibility and I believe that in certainty is where boring is. It's where boring is. It's where everything's the same over and over and over again. The more we allow ourselves to change that, the easier it is. I realize this also when I was working that nine to five job, I remember specifically outcome as working that nine to five job selling woman's shoes at Barneys New York. There were days I would go into work and I'd be very focused on a certain outcome. I would say, okay, my goal is to sell. It was a commission-based job. I got paid like 5 or 6% commission on whatever I sold and the idea is that if I sell like $5,000 that's like a 300 something dollars. I'd go in some days I'd be okay my outcomes, I want to sell this amount. When I went in and I was helping people and I was then attached to people and how they responded to me and the hopes that they would buy something because if they would buy something I would then have my outcome.

The more I would try to control all of these at different aspects and the more attached I was to the outcome, the more resistant I would because the more attached I was. I was also saying I wasn't trusting the process. If I was helping somebody, I was like, okay, this person needs to buy because I only have a couple of extra hours on my shift left and I need to hit my goal and then I would be attached to the outcome and it would create this resistance around everything and then what would happen is those customers would feel that resistance from me and then they wouldn't buy. But let me share with you something. There is a magic to detachment. There were days I would go into work completely detached from the outcome. Still with the intention. This doesn't mean detachment is like we're just aloof and we just have no direction whatsoever. Still have intention. It's like I intend to help people today. I intend to have this outcome but I'm not attached to it having to happen my happiness, my internal state of being is not attached to the outside. That's really what attachment is to. We have the inner world and when we're attached we are in a way trying to control. We are like grabbing the universe by the throat.

This is the throat of the universe. We are grabbing the universe by the throat and we're saying it better workout like this. We're trying to control the outside and attached to it rather than detaching from it emotionally and energetically. But if we were to detach from it, we would then become freer. That sales commission job and every day I went in, I started at zero. It was like new every single day. The cool thing about that is it was like a law of attraction playground. I got to see what worked and what didn't work because every day I started new, and I'll tell you the most magical days were the days I was the most detached from the outcome and from how people acted. I would just have fun. I would focus on the intention of the vision, but it was mainly focused on detachment from outcome, having fun, trusting the process. That's when magic would really begin to happen. Even this works with relationships as well. I remember when I first got into one of my past relationships when I was in a relationship with the amazing Leo war and when we first started dating, I remember I was really trying to control, I was attached to the outcome super attached to the outcome.

It's was like, I hope it works out. I really hope it works out. It was like the beginning. I never felt like that before. Also, I never had that perspective, but I never had a like a soul for connection with someone before. But I remember the beginning of our relationship, even though we were in different cities, she was in LA, I was in Vegas. I'd be thinking, I'd hope everything goes well. She went to Europe with her best friends and I was worried. I was like, I hope, I hope that you know, everything's still going well even though we're so far away and we can't talk as much or in different times zones and stuff. The more attached to what I was, the more resistant I felt. Then more resistance she felt because energetically we also have, you know, let's get a little esoteric here. We have energetic cords from person to person. We all have energetic cords that when we think about someone, we're sending them energy and as vice versa. What happens is when we're attached, we're trying to control. We are in a way rigidly controlling that energetic cord. Then that causes resistance.

If you're trying to attract love into your soul, into your life, the more you think about this person and the more you feel resistance cause they're not acting the way you want, the more you resist them. The more they feel that because energy is contagious. There's magic though to detachment because detachment is also not, it is unconditional love. Many times, you'll feel even more of that love. Leo and I were in a relationship for about a year. We're still very good friends and we had this deep love for each other, even though we're not together. The moment that it changed because we were starting to feel resistance in our relationship. We were traveling the world like you guys may have seen. We were in Costa Rica. The more we tried to control and we had an expectation and attachment to an expectation of each other, the more resistance and in a little bit of a box we felt. We felt like we were in a prison of our own beliefs, a prison of our expectations of each other, but then what we realized was that if we can let go of these expectations and let go of these labels and these identities, that even being together, we then felt free. We even felt closer than ever and it was something. It was a magical type of thing.

It doesn't mean that we're back together. It was a very happy ending. We both are still amazing friends and we will be for our whole lives. However, the reason I share that is there's a magic in an unconditional love that happens when you're not attached to how love has to be. When you're not attached to different thoughts and even your internal world, the time you feel suffering in your internal world is when you feel attached to your thoughts. Because when you feel attached to your thoughts, many times you start to identify with your thoughts, you start to say, this is who I am and one of the biggest cons in life is that we believe we are our thoughts. We think thoughts, but we are not our thoughts but we think we are. We become attached to it because becomes safe, but when we step into the unknown, this is where then we can experience. You can't experience anything new in this little box because all you're going to experience is more of what you know. However, if you step into what you don't know, this is where then the mind can't try to just jump to the easiest thing.

The mind can't jump to what's familiar because there's nothing familiar with a new environment. If you go to the same gym every day, you're like, okay, I'm going to work out right here. Okay, now I'm going to go to that machine over there. I do this every Wednesday. Then what happens if you go to a completely new gym? Maybe some type of like they have this place in Vegas. You go. Whereas like different types of yoga boot camp stuff and all this other stuff in different rooms and, and all these little dumbbells and stuff that you use your mind, you go in there and be like, that's just, no, I don't know. By branching out and decided to do something like that. You may meet the love of your life right there next to you doing a little boot camp, little dumbbell thing, and you're like, Whoa, that's not a backward side. But I like, Oh, now we've got another life up. But here's the thing with love little pedestal. Look at that. We're on a pedestal. Oh look, we're at the same level. Imagine you make something very important. What we didn't do is we put it on a pedestal.

It's up here. You say, look at you. Look at you up there. You're so beautiful. Oh my God. It doesn't work out. It feels so good. The moment we put something on a pedestal and we make it very important, is the moment we create resistance. Importance equals resistance in importance. Many times, also equals attachment. I'll tell you right now, anytime I make something important, I get stopped on my hand. He goes, Aaron, no. I was like, don't you know there have been times I'm like, I'm looking at a house. I'm like, I really want this house. I really want this house. I start feeling resistance. I started really thinking about it. I get my own head about it, and then things will kind of fall apart. It's a universe going, sorry. No, just relax. It's okay. We got this. Okay. That's what happens. When you start to date somebody like, Oh my God, you're on a pedestal. You're still amazing. Just some music, just so amazing. She's like, why am I feeling this resistance from this person? I like this person. I want to like them, but I feel this resistance and the universe goes on. Your hand goes, Aaron. No, let me go. Okay, detach.

You may be attached to a certain person, relationships. You had certain people you had certain thoughts you have thinking those are who you are. That's your identity. When you realize that you can cut that ball and chain. You thought it was a chain, but actually, it was like a piece of dental floss. You could just cut that dental floss so easily and just be free and be free. The key is the realization that you are not your thoughts, that you do not need anyone else in your life to make you happy. You generate your happiness from within. You did not need the outcome to turn out a certain way. You do not need to be attached to certain beliefs, labels or identity. It is a false premise that we've been sold. It is a false premise that we believed and we have to take responsibility for it. When we change that, we change everything. The key to everything I'm sharing with you today is to let go. That's it. Let go and be free. Step into the unknown challenge. Become aware of the story. You tell yourself the story about how reality works, the story that you have to remain attached to the outcome, the story that the people you meet, you have to be a certain way.

There's a story around all of these things and when you let go of that story and you detach from it, you become free and when you become free, you become empowered. When I became free of that belief that I had to do intermittent fasting within a one and half hour window, I felt like there was a hug where I can eat whatever I want and I can have a shake in the morning. It’s a whole new world and you would have a whole new world. You're attached to a breakup that you went through. Then you're going to feel resistance in this little box, but if you just let go and you realize the truth that there are like billions of people out there and that if you had this deep connection with this person, then there's a likelihood that you could have even a deeper connection with someone else and then you learned a lot from that relationship and that now you know that there's something out there even better for you. Many times, in my life I let go and magic happens. Even my own YouTube stats when I'm intending to grow my channel, the more I wanted to go a certain way, the more resistance I feel, but the more I'm cool, the more I'm cool. I just have fun.

You guys can feel that and remember you guys probably see me do that analogy before. I'm really attached to what you do and how you react to me and what you think about me and you feel that resistance. We're going down this beautiful river and this beautiful river is taking us exactly where we need to go. But we're trying to grab onto branches. We're trying to grab onto things. We are like just trying to like viciously go this. It's like, dude, the current is taking you where you need to go. Just chill out and relax bro. Don't be attached. Don't try to control. Just be. The more you let go when you become free of trying to control, the more you let go, you become free of your thoughts. People trying to have them act a certain way. The outcomes of beliefs, labels, identity, the freer you will actually be. This is the key to really becoming the kind of person that you want to be.

My name is Aaron Doughty and I help people expand their consciousness. My areas of interest for this blog include motivation, meditation, neuroscience and enlightenment. The purpose of is to inspire change to those who want to experience more in life. I will openly and passionately share the tools, resources and processes that have made a difference in the quality of my life to help you do the same in yours. I’ve always believed that finding ways to add value to other peoples lives is the fastest route to both happiness and fulfillment and this is my genuine intention.